Work and live well, whole, and with courage.
How do I claim my space as a Woman in Leadership without being pushy?
It’s a question that shows up frequently in coaching sensitive, intuitive professional women. These women have the smarts, they’re thoughtful and deep. They’ve climbed the ladder but they’re not fully claiming their space and leading. They’re complying and fitting in and what makes it even harder for them is they know it. Often they’ve been given feedback that they need to speak up more and be visible. Sometimes they’ve been told by a sponsor that…
Read MoreHow can I navigate being the only woman in my team and overcome feelings of exclusion?
Being the only woman on a team can be a challenge. I was involved in a recent conversation where some women in tech were sharing how they felt the need to feign interest in activities or sports they wouldn’t normally engage in, just to be part of the workplace banter. They described being conscious of not talking about their children for fear that it would limit their growth opportunities. Whilst I haven’t been the only woman…
Read MoreHow to use sensitivity as a strength in leadership.
My lived experience has been that my sensitivity has often been judged as a weakness, marginalised and made wrong. I have received comments like, “you’re too fluffy” or “you’re too sensitive” or “that’s not important here” most of my life. For many years I internalised the view that my sensitivity was a weakness and wrongly concluded that something must be wrong with me. I took on the advice to “toughen up” and focus on logic,…
Read MoreA year of reflection, rediscovery and brave beginnings
Vanessa May · Courage Unfolding – A Year Of Reflection, Rediscovery And Brave Beginnings This time last year I was preparing to launch my book. I was excited, nervous, and anxious. I wasn’t new to writing having in the past blogged for Psychologies Life Labs, Huffington Post and Tiny Buddha. But something was different – perhaps it was the physical form of a book or maybe it was writing for myself and not for…
Read MoreRise above: a guide to empowerment for career women.
In the bustling realm of a career woman’s life, my journey has been a tapestry woven with threads of growth, resilience, and the empowering shift from fawning to self-advocacy. Like many others, I too grappled with the inclination to prioritise everyone else’s needs over my own – a habit that often left me feeling overshadowed in both my personal and professional spheres. Embracing my fears: The first pivotal step in my transformation was confronting and…
Read MoreThe Exhaustion Trap: Overcome the habit that keeps you slogging it out.
What drives your exhaustion? It’s a relentless cycle. You push and slog it out to keep up or get ahead. You can’t switch off because there’s always something else to focus on and achieve. You juggle work and home, and your boundaries blur with hybrid working. You enjoy the flexibility of working from home, but it’s even harder to switch off from everyone else’s stuff. You feel like you’re burning out; the only choice is…
Read MoreHow to stand up for yourself when the jokes are at your expense
I’ve been reflecting on situations that bring out my passivity. One of those is humour that isn’t funny. You know the moments; they’re point-scoring conversations full of quips and innuendos at your expense. They’re conversations that have a derogatory tone where someone is puffing their ego up by putting you down. I’ve questioned what belief in me drives the passivity. I know I don’t find it funny. I know it damages our relationship. I want…
Read MoreHow to create your own support team
Sometimes in life, we experience hard things. Sometimes when it hurts the tendency is to react by armouring up, being tough and going it alone. After all, you absolutely know that you can rely on yourself – but can you? Being fiercely independent and stoic can also mean that you’re in an echo chamber of your own fears, doubts and limiting beliefs. An emotional support team is made up of people you feel completely safe…
Read MoreHow to clear the noise when you’re overwhelmed
I woke up this morning feeling anxious. My brain has too many tabs open. It was full of things that were on my list that needed attention. Each one felt massively important and urgent. I am at capacity this week with work, and I notice how my week started with an urgent request for a meeting and it has followed that reactive pattern. This is contributing to the anxious feelings alongside the sadness and grief…
Read MoreHow to tune back into your intuition when you’ve tapped out
Does having power or no power change your behaviour? It happened to me last week. I was in the middle of a work gig and something weird was going on. Something felt off. If I use metaphor to describe it, it was like the moment before a thunderstorm. Something was brewing. I wasn’t in the lead position, someone else was in front and so whilst I sensed it, I decided in the moment I…
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