The Leadership for Women Blog

with Vanessa May

Do life well, whole and with courage.

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How to stand up for yourself when the jokes are at your expense

I’ve been reflecting on situations that bring out my passivity. One of those is humour that isn’t funny. You know the moments; they’re point-scoring conversations full of quips and innuendos at your expense. They’re conversations that have a derogatory tone...
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How to create your own support team

Sometimes in life, we experience hard things. Sometimes when it hurts the tendency is to react by armouring up, being tough and going it alone. After all, you absolutely know that you can rely on yourself – but can you?  ...
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How to clear the noise when you’re overwhelmed

I woke up this morning feeling anxious. My brain has too many tabs open. It was full of things that were on my list that needed attention. Each one felt massively important and urgent. I am at capacity this week...
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How to tune back into your intuition when you’ve tapped out

Does having power or no power change your behaviour?   It happened to me last week. I was in the middle of a work gig and something weird was going on. Something felt off. If I use metaphor to describe...
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Why women fail to experience true career success

I often hear experiences of women working harder, earning less, staying in unhealthy work environments and juggling everything whilst putting themselves last.  These women share their stories of struggle, pushing hard and frustration.  They feel like they take one step...
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Why it’s actually OK to be selfish

One common thread among the women I work with is this notion of having to hurry everything.  They wake up with a list in their heads, then jump onto the wheel of juggling work and life and the many roles...
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How to stop apologising and own your authority

Live Courageously is a book for women who conform to people pleasing, procrastinating, burning out, self-doubt and imposter syndrome but know they’re built for more.  The book draws on my own experience and those of women I’ve coached. Women like...
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How to stop people pleasing and claim your courage

People pleasing has been an old protective habit of mine. For much of my life, I focused my attention on others’ needs – trying to do my best to accommodate, help or satisfy them. I became very good at this...
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3 simple steps to rediscover happiness at work

You’re not sleeping well. You used to work out and meditate but don’t feel motivated. Your main concern is your work performance, but you get distracted easily and working from home isn’t helping with your motivation. You feel stuck, bored,...
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Why you should break your own rules

One of my favourite phrases is that your first marriage is with yourself. I love it because it reminds me that my first and foremost job is to get into right relationship with myself. Sounds easy? I can tell you...
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How to move through negative emotions

One of the common things I see in coaching is clients arriving in a tough spot. They share the story of what’s going on and how stuck they feel. They want to know the way out and when this feeling...
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How to embrace being a highly sensitive person

“You’re too sensitive.” “You need to grow a tougher skin.” “You’re made of sterner stuff than this.” Sound familiar? These phrases have been a part of my life experience and I genuinely thought something was wrong with me that I...
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How to get rid of expectations

The dictionary defines an expectation as “a strong belief that something will happen or be the case.” It is then followed by the statement, “reality has not lived up to expectations.” Herein is the conundrum: how do you have a...
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Why your future won’t be found in the past

I noticed that over the past year I could find my heart and thoughts being drawn back to the past. Sounds, sights and smells would take me back to a remembering of life before my divorce, of a time when...
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10 affirmations to help recovering perfectionists

Sometimes we are unkind in the way we talk to ourselves. We hold up high ideals and expectations and when we struggle or fail to meet them, we can give ourselves an incredibly hard time whilst pretending to the outside...